‘This is our support:’ Wassermanns find strength in Humboldt

Mara Doepker is grateful to have her son Jacob Wassermann, but says she feels guilt for the 16 families who lost loved ones in the Humboldt Broncos bus crash on April 6, 2018.

“Those families don’t have their loved one to move forward with,” she said.

Jacob Wassermann, paralyzed from the naval down, was one of 13 who survived the crash.

Wassermann attends physiotherapy three times a week to get stronger and learn new ways to live with paralysis.

Doepker said while Wassermann’s physical injuries have healed, he’s still dealing with the emotional effects and the family will be attending Saturday’s memorial without him.

“Jacob is just not able to,” she said. “He needs to process this in his own way. He’s a very private person.”

The days leading up to the anniversary have been hard on the family. They live just south of Humboldt and recently renovated their home to make it accessible for Jacob’s wheelchair.

Doepker said the renovation and Jacob’s recovery served as a distraction for the past year, but as the anniversary approached, Doepker found herself fighting back grief and sadness again.

“So we’re finally just getting settled in that process and now seeing the different advertisings, the different media discussions about the memorial, it brings it all back,” she said. “You go right back to that night.”

Still, as they move on from the crash, she said Humboldt is where they draw their strength from.

Doctors have said Jacob will likely never leave his wheelchair, but Doepker said the family finds comfort knowing there’s a community watching over him as he adjusts to his new reality.

“If (Jacob) was carrying a bag out of a store or there was potholes or anything as he was getting used to his wheelchair and the mobility, there’s tons of people around we know, that know him, that would be there to help. That’s a comfort for us,” she said.

Finding closure may be elusive for the family, said Doepker, noting a song, a semi driving past or a stop sign will always be reminders of the tragic day.

“I don’t know if it ever closes,” she said. “Someone said once you build scar tissue over it so it doesn’t hurt quite as badly.”